Document Information

Date: 1866-12-18
By: The Montreal Herald
Citation: “Mr. Howland was Sea Sick on the Voyage”, The Montreal Herald (18 December, 1866)
Other formats: TBA

“MR. HOWLAND WAS SEA SICK ON THE VOYAGE.”

General Press Despatch.

Tell the glad news, the delegates at last, Have reached Britannia’s shores, escaped the blast.

John A. in peace has sipped his usual tipple, As if the swelling waves were but a ripple, And Cartier, heir of old Jacques Cartier’s pluck, With midriff undisturbed, thinks he’s in luck. No waves annoy them, deep in whist or brag, They laugh and joke, nor feel the moments lag· While Howland, moaning, tossing, bans the day,

Then, retching loudly, turns the other way. “Steward,” he calls, “a basin quickly bring, “Shall I e’er see another budding spring? “No more” he gasps “shall I Toronto view, “Oh ye great powers,” but here his words were few,

Cold damps upon his forehead stood in beads, He calls for Cartier, Cartier never heeds. Then to John A. appealing for some brandy, Found that he’d drunk the only bottle handy. The bar was closed, unfortunate Howland raved,

And swore that he was sick, and they were saved

By that arch traitor, his false leader Brown. Here the ship gave a lurch, he feared he’d drown, And vowed in tearful penitential mood, To leave Coalition, now he understood That he got all the ill, and they the good. They kept possession of each thing they got While he must all give up, oh! hapless lot, Why had he not a stomach strong as they, To walk unharmed amid the foam and spray· They could each meal enjoy and drain the cup’ While he, [poor?] soul, must watery gruel sup. Once back to Canada’s beloved shore

He’d tempt the Atlantic’s stormy seas no more·